Paul and Janet in their teen years

By the time Paul and Janet reached adolescence, the family had regained its equilibrium and their teenage years were happy ones in the Gass household. The big kitchen in their home in Chelsea served as a focus of family activity and provided a warm, cozy ambience for the many visiting friends and relatives. Adele seemed to cook continually, preparing everything from scratch. She earned a reputation among friends and family as a great cook and good baker. Her soups were especially admired. She loved to nurture children, making sure all their physical needs were met.

All the members of the family liked to congregate in the kitchen, talking and eating. Everybody interacted with each other. Paul had a huge appetite and would down enormous hero sandwiches concocted from rye bread, pickles, coleslaw, and every kind of kosher meat imaginable. He was also big on ice cream. He would take a half-gallon container of ice cream, cut it in half, and eat out of the carton.

A Bar Mitzvah is major milestone in any boy’s life, but especially for the oldest grandson of a grand rabbi.

Both Janet and Paul were active teenagers with lots of friends. They were constantly on the go, roller skating, playing stickball, and bowling. They especially enjoyed just hanging out with the kids they liked.

Paul (back row, far left) with his crowd

Janet was attractive with excellent taste in clothing. She listened to records constantly, loved to throw slumber parties, and championed the underdog. The phone was always ring­ing for her. She loved to shop and her taste in jewelry was conservative.

Janet was not a rebellious adolescent. According to her mother, she was very respectful, sincere, and straight forward.

Janet was a cheerleader in school, bubbly in personality with a strong, hearty laugh. She was bright but not pretentious. She had a passion for Spanish and Latin, and even asked her parents to send her Spanish and Latin texts one summer when she worked a counselor at an overnight camp.

In 1957, Janet graduated from Chelsea High School and enrolled in Colby College, then a two-year institution in Maine. After graduating in 1959, she moved to New York City, where she held a day job and attended New York Univers­ity (NYU) in the evening. She was awarded her college degree from NYU in 1962.

Janet and her prom dates

Six months earlier, on October 16, 1961, Janet had married Laurence (Larry) Dayton. It was his second marriage and Adele had a premonition that the marriage would not work. Paul shared her apprehension. Although Janet did not heed Adele's advice to break off the engagement, Adele provided her with the fairy-tale wedding that Janet had dreamed about. According to Paul:

“My parents didn't have money, yet they threw a very expensive wedding for Janet. To pay for it, they had to borrow against the cash value of an insurance policy.”
 

Janet and Max at her engagement party	Mr. and Mrs. Larry Dayton

The newlyweds moved to Amherst, Massachusetts, where Larry was a graduate student in a doctoral program and Janet worked in the campus’s Hillel office to support them. Janet wanted children but Larry did not. For three years she tried to make the marriage work but the couple couldn't resolve their differences. Janet walked out once but then returned. The separation became permanent when she discovered Larry was interested in someone else. Initially she took another apartment in Amherst but six or seven months afterward she returned to her parents' home, feeling like she had failed at life. In 1963, Janet died of a broken heart.

Paul remembered the shock of Janet’s death on the family:

“I lived in the same house with Janet and it just blew my mind that I didn't know what was going on although I had noticed that she stopped taking care of herself. I never really knew my sister and she never really knew me. She didn't have any support mechanisms in place when her marriage failed.” 

The loss of two of his three children devastated Max. He became quieter and passive after Janet's death. Adele was able to share her grief with friends and family. Max never discussed it but Paul observed the effect on him:

“The death of two of his children was very hard. When my brother died my father kept all his toys around. When my sister died he had all her records and different things around for years and years.”

The house on Fremont Avenue held too many painful memories, so two years after Janet’s death, Max and Adele sold it and moved to a house nearby on Highland Avenue in Chelsea.
 

     
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